Can A Man Cry And Still Be A Man


When I was a young boy, I had the misfortune of falling off a swing backwards. This resulted in me landing on my chest and it hurt, real bad. So, I got up and started crying because I was in pain and I was having an issue with my breathing. I cried all the way home and once I got in the house, I was balling to my father about what happened. It was liked he could have cared less. He blew me off and I was in my backyard crying away until I was tired of crying and I went back to playing with my friend. I suppose the moral of the story should be “don’t swing recklessly” but the real moral of the story is “boys don’t cry.”

Growing up, I believed that a man should not cry, period. Outside of someone gravely ill or passed on or celebrating the birth of a child or winning a championship there was no reason for a man to cry. I was a young man attempting to reach manhood and I was not going to be crying in front of others because I didn’t want to look weak. From my point of view, crying was a girl thing. God knows, I had to be privy to that. I grew up with a younger sister and she cried all the time. No, I was going to grow up to be big and bad and not shed tears.

Imagine my surprise when I discovered as an adult that I would cry more than I did as a teenager. Besides losing my grandfather and my father, I cried when I left Michigan to move to California and I cried when I left California. I almost cried when the RAIDERS lost to the Ravens in the AFC Championship game and the tears was close to falling. I cried when I lost this girl and that girl but when I lost the girl I loved since I was 20, I cried almost every night because it hurt so much and you wake up the next day to experience the hurt all over again. A co-worker once commented that a man who cries is displaying his feminine side but that is not factual. Crying is the result of emotionally distress and a man tends to allows his emotions to build and build and build until his emotions pop like a champagne cork. When the cork pops, we let loose with the water.

On Monday’s episode of The View, they played a clip of the 60 Minutes piece on John Boehner and they highlighted his crying and Barbara Walters said that Speaker-elect Boehner has an emotional problem and that if Nancy Pelosi had been crying like Mr. Boehner, she would have been called weak. I would agree but Pelosi has always been hard-nosed. Crying would be out of character for her. Now, Boehner is a different story. Boehner is emotionally and people will expect him to unleash the water works and they will like him showing his emotionally side even if he is a Republican. When I look at John Boehner crying, I’m reminded of Dick Vermeil, a man who would cry if the sun turned black. Vermeil was a coach in the NFL and he was known for his display of emotion with his tears. (Strangely, in this day and age there no videos online of Dick Vermeil crying but I found this tease about his crying so it will have to do) I need to know if Vermeil was a Republican and if so are Republicans known to be crybabies? (Just kidding)

Crying do not mean you are weak or helpless. It just means that you are human. There is no shame to shed a tear or two, however, a crier may need to follow some etiquette when it comes to crying.

Rule 1. No crying in front of an audience. An audience can get confuse as to why the crying. Crying requires those around you to feel your pain. To understand why the need to cry.

Rule 2. Never get front of a camera and let the water flow. Crying in front of a camera is worse than being in front of an audience because you could have potential millions of people watching you get weepy.

Rule 3. If the need to cry is so great, excuse yourself and go to a quiet area and let the emotions roll.

Rule 4. If you need to cry in front of someone, make sure it is always family and

Rule 5. If you must cry, read Rule 1 again.


~ by R8RBOB on December 16, 2010.

4 Responses to “Can A Man Cry And Still Be A Man”

  1. Crying or not, I don’t trust Boehner. For me, he is too quick to comprommise. And there can be zero compromise with Oblablah’s plan to use the Constitution only as toilet paper and ignore his oath of office. Close your ears, open your eyes. Think. Think Orwell anytime he reads the telepromter. Merry Christmas to all.

    • Now, now Ridgway. This isn’t about Boehner. It is about showing your emotions and still be a man. Good god man, does everything have to be about Obama?

  2. I agree…I don’t trust the man. If he wasn’t such a snake, he could cry all day long and I wouldn’t think much about it!

    • I used Boehner as a example only because Babs was mocking him because of his crying. He is still a politician and I haven’t forgot it. I just don’t get caught up in the macho thing no more now that I’m pushing 40.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: